Rational thoughts. Logic. These things mean nothing when it comes to emotion. I am not sure they can coexist. Emotions can be crushing sometimes. And then the thoughts become irrational. I know I am not worthless. I know I am not deserving of bad things. And yet there are moments when those thoughts invade. And I feel them. But I fight them. I know they don't last. I know this time is fleeting. Life is a rollercoaster... hold on through the low times because the good times will come. And enjoy the good times because they won't last.
Some in the world believe everything is transient... things don't last. It appears to me that this is true. But what do you do with that? What is the purpose? I know the right answers are that you learn and you grow. But dammit... sometimes the growing pains sure are painful.
I'm not quite sure what I want out of this life. I'm not sure what waits for me down the road. I can only see a short distance. I suppose there should be some freedom in that. So for now I'll do what I have to do. I get up each day. I make it to the end of the day. Today I end my day with Strictly Ballroom... one of the only romantic movies I can stand. I don't even get bitter about the romantic part of it... I suppose it's because it's one of those movies where the ugly, geeky girl wins in the end. And it makes me smile. So that's a good thing.
No comments:
Post a Comment