Weird day

I've had such a weird day. It didn't seem weird, but looking back it was just an odd combination of both good and bad things.

First I spent a part of my work day discussing with my coworker how we think they're going to close our branch this year. This is bad because I need a job. I've been looking the entire 6 months I've been at this job and haven't found anything. It would be good because I hate this job passionately and being laid off and getting unemployment again while I job hunt doesn't sound horrible.

Then I went to an aerial silks class. This is good. It's always a good thing to do something physical and meet new people. But I weighed myself before class. This was bad. I spent the entire class surrounded by mirrors knowing I have now gained the majority of my weight back. I can no longer say I'm just a little chubby. For my frame, for my health, for me... I am fat. Period. So in a way weighing myself was good. I know I have to do something now. When I'm teaching I feel strong. I realized I can ignore the weight. But in the aerial silks class I can't ignore it. I'm out of my element and hyper aware of my weaknesses.

So I drove home trying not to cry about it. I get home and had a check in the mail from the "unclaimed cash" website... I had sent off a form months ago to claim the cash. I had no idea how much it was. It was over $300! It will cover my vacation next weekend. So then I was all happy again. :)

So yeah, my day is a bunch of first world problems I suppose (though the idea of losing my job is a real problem)... so hopefully I'm getting my act together enough I will actually take care of this stupid weight and send it in the right direction.