Mom lights up the room!

My mother was seriously like a source of light. I almost said "ray of sunshine" but that just sounds too sugary sweet. And she wasn't sugary sweet. But when she walked into a room she brightened it and lifted the moods of anyone around her. She was always smiling and joking... always helpful. When she was in the hospital hooked up to all those machines my sister and I talked about how what a bummer it was that the nurses hadn't gotten to spend a few minutes with her awake. She'd already befriended everybody in the other section before her surgery, but the people in the Cardiac ICU didn't get to know her. We did our best to convey the fact that this pediatric sized elderly woman was a ball of energy and light. I hope some of them understood.

I find that writing about her helps keep her memories alive for me, but it also seems to be introducing her energy to people who never even met her. Friends of mine tell me how they like reading the stories about her... and the comments they make... well, it seems I am representing her accurately.

I was thinking about her last night. I have purchased 2 old dresses from the thrift store which I am going to attempt to turn into a Steampunk costume (google it if you don't know what that is). I figure it will be fun to try, and maybe it'll turn into something I can wear to conventions instead of my standard jeans, sneakers, funny t-shirt. When I get nervous about trying or starting the project I just remember the curtains mom made to match a single she already had... they looked the same. She just worked it out and did it. Or the costumes she would make for herself and her fellow dancers in The Silver Tappers. She was not a great seamstress... but she just went ahead and did it anyway. And I do seem to be following in her footsteps in that mentality... just do it. Very Nike of us.

She taught me to sew. She taught me to try. She taught me to do. Some days I feel like I carry the same light she had... I'm not sure it comes as naturally for me... but I do try to let it shine. :)