The Man with the Iron Fists - A YGP review

I saw the movie The Man with the Iron Fists today. You know, for a modern day Kung Fu movie it honestly wasn't half bad. Don't go expecting high end acting or anything. But it was honestly pretty cool. Now you must also know that I am a big action film fan. And I don't mind some blood and guts. So if these things bother you, then no, it's not the film for you. It was very bloody, though in a cartoon, Kung Fu flick kind of way. Here are my thoughts:

1. Russell Crowe is not typically an actor I love. I don't hate him or anything. But I don't generally think "Ooh, Russell Crowe... sexy!" But he is by far the best actor in this movie... and it shows. And quite honestly, and quite annoyingly, he proves that old, fat guys can be charming and sexy. Now... for all you old, fat guys out there... I am not insulting you. I am merely again reminded that I won't get to be an old, gray, fat woman and be considered sexy. So Russell swaggers his way through this film with a big gut, dressed in some cool steampunkish clothes, and is, at least to me, quite sexy. I was always quite happy when he was on the screen.

Old, fat, and sexy!

2. Lucy Liu is the shit. And how in the world is it that she isn't aging at all? I mean... she is just unbelievably cool, beautiful, and kick ass. I was really happy when she and her black clad posse of brothel babes started kicking ass. :) She's awesome.

Timeless and bad ass

3. Every time the bad guy "Silver Lion" was on the screen I kept screaming "Kaaaaahhhhhnnnn!" inside my head. Star Trek fans will get my meaning... I mean, the Lions hair in general was so very 80s... it was either Kahn or some big hair band video look. I get it... they were "lions" but... damn. :)

"Kaaahhhnnnn!!!"

"Kahn!"

This is what I heard in my head through the movie. :)

4. RZA of the Wu Tang Clan directed this and also starred as The Blacksmith aka The Man with the Iron Fists. I thought his directing style was decent for the genre. But the man needs to invest in some acting classes. It would be nice for an actual emotion to creep across his face once in a while. Maybe hang with Crowe for a bit. :)

Overall... good popcorn flick. Lots of violence and blood... some sex, though a surprising lack of nudity. Maybe to keep an R rating they had to pick one... blood spurts OR boobs... and they went with the blood.

So go see it if you dig Kung Fu! Not a bad way to spend the morning... though my candy sucked. Not all chocolate covered cookie dough brands are created equally. Mine was more like chocolate covered ass. :) But it was chocolate. So... yeah... I ate it. :)